It has been a minute since I have blogged and so much has happened. Some good some bad and yes some sad. It is not easy to put your life on the paper and then to let people read what my life has been like but I need it help me and I pray that it helps someone else.
The last time I blogged it was about my Zachary and the life choices that he was making and how I have to learn to let him lead his life and to make the best. He is no longer living at home and this is permanent decision. He is 18 and he wants to live a life that I can not agree with so he is not here. My Mother use to say if you can't follow the rules and regulations of my house then you need to find somewhere else to live. It hurts me that I don't know where my son is living. But I do know that God will take care of him. As his Mother I carried him for nine months but he is in my heart forever. I pray everyday that God will restore our relationship and that he will look in the mirror and see the Zachary that I see. I have learned that I am not the only person with a child and a strand relationship but I guess I am the only dummy putting out for the world to read.
I know that I can not live my life in the shadow of my children I have to live for me. I have to learn about Kim and learn to take care of her. My health has to be my main focus. Since I have had one stroke the odds of me having another are extremely high I may not be so lucky the next time. You have to know that the stroke was the best and worst thing to happen to me. It showed me that the way I was living and was going to kill me and that would not be fair to my wonderful daughter who deserves to have a mother that is present in her life. For the first time in years I had a blood pressure of 134/84. My Doctor was speechless and rightfully so. When I had my stroke my blood pressure was 202/168. I was so happy because that means that I am taking care of me. And with me taking care of me it is allowing me to see clearly and to be present in the moment.
Chapter 42 will be the best chapter of the book of Kim. My business is getting my full attention and I see so much growth for Kimskakery. I have found my lane and if I stay in my lane then all I can do is win.
Jordan is adjusting to being the only child at home. It is a hard adjustment for her to not have her brother everyday to lean on and talk to. I also pray that God will restore her relationship with Zach because all they have is each other. Jordan is doing amazing in school. She is being inducted into the National Honor Society at her school. She has also been extended a wonderful opportunity to be able to graduate from high school with either a Associate Degree or at least two years of credits that can be transferred to any college. To say I am proud is a understatement I am in awe of her and all of her accomplishments. In the 3rd grade I was told that she could not read on grade level and that she needed to be held back. I said no and we worked super had she amazed every teacher and counselor and the way she paced out of the IEP. I had to really go to war for her so that everyone saw what I saw a intelligent child who would succeed.
I truly believe that Greater is coming for my family and I don't when it will happen but everyday I will get up and give it my ALL.
The last time I blogged it was about my Zachary and the life choices that he was making and how I have to learn to let him lead his life and to make the best. He is no longer living at home and this is permanent decision. He is 18 and he wants to live a life that I can not agree with so he is not here. My Mother use to say if you can't follow the rules and regulations of my house then you need to find somewhere else to live. It hurts me that I don't know where my son is living. But I do know that God will take care of him. As his Mother I carried him for nine months but he is in my heart forever. I pray everyday that God will restore our relationship and that he will look in the mirror and see the Zachary that I see. I have learned that I am not the only person with a child and a strand relationship but I guess I am the only dummy putting out for the world to read.
I know that I can not live my life in the shadow of my children I have to live for me. I have to learn about Kim and learn to take care of her. My health has to be my main focus. Since I have had one stroke the odds of me having another are extremely high I may not be so lucky the next time. You have to know that the stroke was the best and worst thing to happen to me. It showed me that the way I was living and was going to kill me and that would not be fair to my wonderful daughter who deserves to have a mother that is present in her life. For the first time in years I had a blood pressure of 134/84. My Doctor was speechless and rightfully so. When I had my stroke my blood pressure was 202/168. I was so happy because that means that I am taking care of me. And with me taking care of me it is allowing me to see clearly and to be present in the moment.
Chapter 42 will be the best chapter of the book of Kim. My business is getting my full attention and I see so much growth for Kimskakery. I have found my lane and if I stay in my lane then all I can do is win.
Jordan is adjusting to being the only child at home. It is a hard adjustment for her to not have her brother everyday to lean on and talk to. I also pray that God will restore her relationship with Zach because all they have is each other. Jordan is doing amazing in school. She is being inducted into the National Honor Society at her school. She has also been extended a wonderful opportunity to be able to graduate from high school with either a Associate Degree or at least two years of credits that can be transferred to any college. To say I am proud is a understatement I am in awe of her and all of her accomplishments. In the 3rd grade I was told that she could not read on grade level and that she needed to be held back. I said no and we worked super had she amazed every teacher and counselor and the way she paced out of the IEP. I had to really go to war for her so that everyone saw what I saw a intelligent child who would succeed.
I truly believe that Greater is coming for my family and I don't when it will happen but everyday I will get up and give it my ALL.
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